Sick and Tired of Sick and Tired and Rantings

I think I am on my 3rd sinus infection since Thanksgiving. I keep drinking ACV everyday thinking it will help and maybe it does... I don't know. It is also supposed to help with weight also; it has not yet.

I don't want to report my weight this week.. I have gained 3-4 lbs, but lost a 1/2 inch.

Today we are getting close to the end of school. I am happy. I am tired tired today and could use the rest.

No rest for the wicked...

I have a funeral and ALL of Christmas shopping.

Yes, I said ALL.

Because I didn't want to charge anything and had to wait for paychecks. Yet, I am not complaining.

I am so very grateful to have some money to spend. I know with the recession, there are families without jobs and can't get Christmas or food or heat. I want to help some people instead of glorying in our safety of good jobs with decent paychecks.

This would be a good year to par down ( is that the word? I know it isn't pair or pear...)I have wanted to do that for years, but I remember not getting much as a kid-mom didn't work, there were 5 kids, my dad changed jobs whenever he got mad at his boss or situation and never wanted to work for "THE MAN"- (btw if you meet "THE MAN" can you tell me if he really is such a bad person to work for, and who he really is..)



(if you ask my mom, that wasn't the reason $$ was tight, but its my blog and my perception)

Needless to say, money didn't grow on trees.

So with that in my past, I don't want my kids to feel like the poor kids in their class. They might think that anyway because I am cheap and tight with money.

But I don't want them to be the spoiled either. Other people's brats are horrible. Why don't people tell their friends and family that their kids are horrible? Instead, those kids are allowed to run wild like hooligans, and parents blame the school, friends, society, ex's or whatever. Why can't anyone just say,

"yea, I know my kids are brats and I am lazy when it comes to disipline."

I am realizing this is turning negative and disjointed and I don't even feel negative, and two girls are two smart comments away from a fist fight.

And I have a headache comming on...

I better just log off.

Jumping the Gun and to Conclusions.

OK, to have a blog is to let it all hang out there while jumping to conclusions. Then, you have to make sure you take it back and hope that all the people you poisioned with your negative thoughts read and understand.

Oh, the lesson of gossip....

Oh, the lesson of NO Patience...

So here is my humble pie. please have a slice with me if you need to.

My FIL came over and told us his future plans. They sound like good righteous goals. I realize that I have not given him enought credit because for so long he didn't give himself credit. He has plans for the temple as soon as he can go. That is bitter sweet, but we all have to have bygones in life and this has to be mine. I feel so sorry for my hubby. In his growing up years with no priesthood example in his home.

BUT

I can't let my bitter sweet what-should-have-beens get in the way of what could be. I can't wait for the future blessings for our family and his potentially new one. How exciting! (you have to say that in the most prince john from the cartoon robin hood voice... what you don' know that one? watch it)

I just have a question.. How would one treat the MIL in a divorce? She has been generous on her own terms, nice when she wants to,loves her kids fiercely, and there are other nice qualities, and

I dont' want to throw the baby out with the bath water so to speak.

I just ready Missy's blog on charity and still have twinges of that hovering over me like sugar plums dancing in my head. What is the better road to take with the situation without getting sucked into it? Gosh now I know how everyone must have felt when Scott and I were at those cross roads.

SO now? How much support do I give and when do I say' " You got to do this on your own...?"

Anyone?, anyone,?

Bueler, ...

Bueler????

Colder than a Can of Worms

IT is 1 degree! 1!! I hate the cold, a lot. It could never be cold again and I would be happy. Not really happy but content. I remember living in Mesa and sometime around September the green would just look wrong and tired, like it needed winter.

I guess I need winter too. It makes me appreciate Summer that much more. Which then makes me think that I am grateful for so many things: like family who are close and our relative health ( I know, ha, we all have gotten out of the hospital) but we are not terminal. I am grateful for our good jobs in this time of recession and I truly feel for those who don't have good jobs.

I know I opened up a can of worms a family issue that I should have kept pent up. I should be more Christlike.

And maybe, just maybe after I get out of church today I will edit it or get rid of it all together because

WWJD....

Not spend days blogging that is for sure.

Creating Drama as if there isn't enough

Do you ever feel that the people around you create drama on purpose? Like they are addicted to it?

I feel that way right now after contemplating next Saturday.- the day we decided to bury Lorna.

My FIL told my MIL she was not welcome to sit with him at the funeral. That was bad enough. aKAK. What a can of worms he opened.

He told one of the kids that he feels divorced already. Ya, ok , but he IS NOT. Not in the eyes of the Lord or the state of Arizona.

You know that is an example of what is wrong with our society today. No one wants to do anything the right way esp when it is the hard way. We have grown too lazy in our comfort. We have become such a society of PC that no one even knows where to draw the line of right and wrong.

And so come this Saturday I will be sitting on watch dog patrol.

Waiting and prepared

For the inevitable episode of Jerry Springer to erupt.

It should be good watching.

Thank You Grandma "Orna"

Lorna M. Scarbrough passed away at 10:58 am 12/3/08. She will be missed by her 10 grandchildren and married spouses , 11 great-grandchildren two sons and daughters in law.

The girls came and got me to go to Snowflake yesterday. We said good-bye in the funeral home. She was still warm and had good color. I took it for granted that people who passed away were cold and stiff immediately. She look peaceful and beautiful, but of course different.

We picked out a coffin, a book and set up the program-spelling the names and getting the order of speaking correct. We made plans to clean her grave site, put make up on her and in general get things ready for her funeral. Then we got to laughing at all the funny memories we had of her.

We ate taco bell and went home. When we went home we gathered to tell the grandkids. My kids didn't get it until later. (We had a rough bedtime and my kids slept together.)

Then we went to Corkey's to eat - again. While we were there Mother came. She slung open the door, and stomped in. Good thing that Corkey's was empty. She accused us of not telling her about Lorna and having to find out from strangers at 5:30 that evening.

I was possessed. I told her she was wrong. Cheska called her at 11 to tell her that she thought grandma had died, and then tried to call her back to confirm it the rest of the day but she didn't answer her phone. Mother said she didn't have missed calls. I said that I was there 1/2 the time when Cheska called; I know she did try to call her all day. Scott piped up and mentioned that if you don't have service, then your phone doesn't show up as a missed call.

She changed the subject after Scott got in on it and asked me what was going on with the funeral. I started to detail it out for her and in the middle of talking to her, she walked out the door. I looked at her and then at the kids. My jaw dropped open...

We kept eating. What should we have done?

Did I tell you?

Did I mention that I love love my hubby??

If, I have not said so before, I want to state it now. I love Scott Scarbrough Jr. He is a good man who endures much and gives more.
He has been so so sweet and attentive and complimentary lately that it seems like aliens have replaced him with a clone.

Except they haven't.

It is just him and how he has grown lately to ignore my faults even more than he has in the past.

What have I done to deserve all the praise and lavish compliments? Who knows.

I pray each day that I am doing something to deserve this from him.

It has been so nice. Have I been that nice to him? I bet not. I hope he knows that even if I am not a better person who deserves this new level of hubby that I am still very grateful, appreciative and feel loved.

I even want to take a page from his book and recipocate the compliements and love. I want to do more for you and want to make your life easier....

"Hey Scott, ?
In case you didn't know."

The feeling is mutual.

Saying goodbye

Sunday we went to Snowflake to say goodbye.

Scott's grandma is in hospice care at his uncle's home.

I don't know how I feel about it all. It was a special, sad and spiritual experience. She was clearly shutting down-didn't have much energy nor could she think clearly. She isn't eating much at all and can't drink much, but the hospice people said that is normal, her body doesn't need much. She is communicating with the other side.
When we left, the baby cried a sad sad cry. She didn't cry a mad or hurt cry, (you mom's know what I am talking about) but something you would hear from an older person. I can't even explain it if you were not there to hear it. It was like she felt how close the veil was and was sad that she couldn't have that still. She was mopey and serious-very unlike herself for 2 days. I hope Lorna is a peace.

And yet, life renews, We have a new little neice in the family- Kelsey at 3 months is no longer the baby baby.

Baby-to -be-named is 4 weeks early, full full head of hair. I think you can put it up all ready, 6lbs 7 oz and 18 inches long!!

to put it in perspective, she is pretty much the same as Kelsey was at full term. Can you imagine if she had been full term??? 11 lb baby!! Yikes and oh my!