A little Hard Work does a body good. Kid, you are NOT entitled to everything or most things.

I am quoting an article from Meridian Magazine , "A sense of entitlement (which is the polar opposite of a sense of responsibility) is endemic among children today.

It is fostered by our demanding, narcissistic society where wants are confused with needs and where everyone seems focused on the notion that he deserves what everyone else has.  Gone are the days when kids expected to have to work for something, even for acclaim.  Everyone gets a trophy now, everyone is recognized, and everyone is special.

Kids grow up in a reality-show world, thinking of themselves as the central character on the stage.  They have a facebook page, they are famous in their own minds, they are like rock stars, and to them there is no room (and no need) for true emotional empathy, or self examination, or personal responsibility.  Nor is there much incentive or motivation to learn to work.

And they think they are entitled not to have limits or boundaries or discipline."

Today we had an attitude adjustment. Scott came home and K's attitude was bad. Working outside helped it out. It was hard for me to watch: not that I am a softy by any means. In fact, the other day at the park I was called the "Meanest Lady He had EVER Met". Ya me. But Scott made sure the attitude adjustment was real. It had to push past a boundary. And that is what dad's are good for. 

And, you know what? she didn't die, she was pleasant all day and she did get to go swimming after her hard work. 

First day of swim lessons.

We have signed up for our annual swim lessons. It is something I look forward to as much or more than my little brood. I start dreaming of fishy kids about March and am not fully satisfied until I see their names written on the blank like that lull me to happiness by stating "pre-3" and "level 2" above their names.

This event is a highlight of my summer. Gone are the days when I tried and failed to evenly tan my Scottish heritage skin. Hello Guppy swimmer! (and I relish it, I might add). That just states how I have matured as a person ( if you define matured as having no life)

There they were, without sunscreen because I am that idiot, in the pool flopping around. Wesie, the ever fearless, was doing flips in the water and showing his little white tush above his too big army print trunks. He could have cared less. I laughed and laughed. However, I stopped laughing when I was told to go sit under the Ramada- no one was allowed to stand at the fence to watch.


are you kidding me?

It is the first day of swim lessons and we can't watch over our kids to make sure they are ok? If the Ramada didn't have the pool office in the way it would be ok, but there is no real way to watch over you kids unless you sit out in the sun on the outside of the pool area.

I so wanted to say something but I am a chicken like that to slink away glowering silently at being forced to follow a rule that I didn't agree with that wasn't even posted anywhere.

sigh, oh well what are you going to do?

My oldest guppy was put in the survival skills class which she was so nervous about. Until I told her that if she backed out she would be in the same class as her brother. Nerves of steel she acquired very quickly-steely nerves that even helped her jump off the low dive and swim in the deep end on her first day.

Way to Go! sis! Nothing like a little sibling competition to help her be all that she can be!

A day in church; AKA a long blog

OK, I will try to cut this in sections as a long blog is also known as a boring blog to read.

I was sitting sacrament meeting (church services) and someone mentioned that we need to record the moments of our lives because in 1 or 2 generations your stories, and triumphs and trials that would help others are lost.

I know I have a life oh so ordinary, but I do think that I should record our family's happenings and insights. But that talk really got me to thinking about when I have blogged last and what I record.

Therefore, HAPPY TO BE TYPING!! I have had that class hanging over my head like the pit and the pendulum, getting closer and closer to chopping me in half. ( it wasn't really that bad, I exaggerate for effect)

This weekend we received rain in town, but not much at our house. I guess that says something about our lack of spirituality and paying of tithing. And I thought I was doing better at that

We went roping- like what else would we do? We are a roping family. It rained and rained; I cleaned and cleaned mud and water from the trailer, yet grateful that we have a trailer to be in, however small that it is for our family now.

We decided to take the kids fishing and to eat in the mountains after church. I got the food ready, the baby ready, and packed all the junk that comes with a baby- I think to the dismay of Scott. We drove up to our family reunion camp site to eat.

First a hint of rain, then smatterings of drops, then bigger drops. So what we thought, we can cook burgers anywhere- rain makes them taste better. As we tried to get the mini grill going, the kids see-sawed on their homemade seesaw, happy that no one had cut it for firewood yet.

The grill was sputtering and not firing. Uhg. Could we eat kibby style burgers (raw)? Could we make a fire and use the grill thing to cook over a fire?
You bet,
I have a true outdoors man on my hands.
Soon we were all gathering twigs and such for the fire and after a lot of blowing and then the bright idea to squirt of diesel fuel additive, Wooosh, We had FIRE. The burgers were great as they always are in the mountains.

Scott and the kids had a balancing contest on a fallen tree. They would run down the tree and see who could make it the farthest. As they were more adept at balancing, they would add levels of difficulty. I think it was a confidence builder for Kennedy, who struggles with that so much. It was so good to see him play with our kids. I hope that day was a memory they have for a long time instead of the spankings they tend to get.

After I cleaned up, Scott discovered that he forgot the tackle box. We decided to just drive. I love a good drive and to keep the kids from getting killed we thought up a game for them. We would think of what thing they had to spy and the first one got a point. The one to 10 would win. Besides the variety of cars, trucks and camptrailers that were on the list, we saw quite a few cow elk, but no big horned sheep. That on was worth 10 points alone in our game.

Relearning how to pray

This weekend was uneventful in most of the daily activities. I found myself raking up my front yard from the winter's debris. It gave me both hope and discouragement to do this. Hope, that spring is coming and discouragement that there is so much to be done in my yard. I can't hardly see my way to plow through it all. Insurmountable task.

Sunday brought on another hint of spring and a good lesson on prayer in Relief Society. The teacher used two articles from the last two conference talks. One was "Pray Always" from Oct 08 and the other was " ". I was taught.

The ideas she said were not new; I heard them in a new way. Isn't that what all truth and knowledge is about? Learning in layers?


I have now a resolve to evaluate how I pray in the morning and the evening- looking for ways to improve. This past year I have resolved to add more gratitiude to my prayers. If I hate an ungrateful child, how much does it bother the Lord to have one too? However, this lesson will help me change how I pray.

The sister who was teaching the lesson mentioned a way to pray that makes the daily pray a two part activity: counceling with the Lord on his goals for you, your desires, and your weaknesses. Then in the evening reporting back to the Lord. I have heard this before, but it has never struck me as profoundly as it did yesterday.
As a lover of words, I am often struck by the usage of one word over another. Passages will often make me pause to think about why one word was used over another.

And so, I let the idea and meaning of the word report wash over the back of my mind while I listened to the message of the lesson.

Report-to tell how the activity went and what your interpretations on the level of success of the activity or mission.

I don't ever report. I ask, beg, pled, obey and now often thank, but rarely report. I don't know why I didn' t think to do this before.

As a child we had a rote prayer for the food and evening- pat memorized words and phrases that no prayer would be complete without. This pattern of praying has seved as a formula for 35 years. Albeit, I have added my own conversations with the Lord in the past few years. But, I wonder why I learned the pattern style prayer and then never taught to take it up a notch? As I ponered this doing dishes yesteday, I realized that I have done the same with my kids, too. We taught them how to pray as little ones, giggling and laughing over their choices of words and topics to pray for, but now that they are older, we have not revisted the topic, teaching them differently.

Where was I when that lesson was taught to pray a more mature prayer? Am I really that dense to not catch on until now? Was I not ready to learn this until now?

I like what I have learned and plan to impliment into my way of praying and to teach my kids how to do so too. Hopefully, they won't wonder why they have to relearn to pray in their 30's.

Saturday is a special day, Its the day we get ready for Sunday

I love days like today. We slept in til 7 (late for us).

We had good laughs, snuggles, hugs and kisses with our kids in bed. I thought that bed would only hold the four of us but somehow we fit another in it too.

We took down fences, threw winter trash away, played in the sunshine and took fences down.

I sat in the truck and took pics of the baby in her girly girl hat. The older kids romped up and down the pasture- chasing cows, dogs and each other.

Scott and I talked and speculated about what our future would hold and what direction the Lord will want us to take in '09. (Love when my hubby waxes spitural; I first fell in love with him in church when I saw him be affected by the spirit. I knew then I had to have a guy in my life like that)

Later we went out to eat for good chicken fried steak and then grocery shopped.

Days like these are not to be forgotten quickly. They are my favorite.

Hello world!!

We have another baby in the family. We have been waiting on her to be the caboose ( for now) but we didn't expect her so soon. She seems to be doing well, except no name. She is two months early, but still came in at 5lbs 4 oz 18 inches long. My bro says she looks huge next to the baby nick named "Polly Pocket" cause she was 13oz (!!!!) when she was born.

Mom is ok too. I hope things improve day by day for them. Congrats bro.

The Theme for 09- R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I borrowed this idea from a friend. (If she doesn't feel comfie with this let me know I will get rid of it). But I think our family will have a theme for the year kinda like Primary. I know we won't be perfect at this but I would like to center at least one FHE (and it may be the only FHE we have for the month) around this topic. I would like to explore it in our home on a variety of levels.

IF anyone of you would like to do this too, maybe we can exchange ideas. My mom told me yesterday that she heard that Pres. Hinkley said that Blogs can be for good to exchange ideas and journal and booster each other.

Even if she is wrong about who said it, I thing the idea is still true. There is far far to much ugly in the world and the only way to let it win is for good people to do nothing.

So Team Scarbrough, respecting the new year.

I will post "Lessons" and outlines on this idea as I think of them or as I get the sent to me. I don't want it to replace any good thing the church has set up, like if they have areas of focus for families all ready.

I just think that our family needs this idea this year.


So tell me anyone, what do you think?

No we are not POLITICAL nor are we making a Political statment.

OK< so without my sis's permission, I want to state BB's name b/c I need someone else to share in the comments I have receive for 7 years.

Did you like name her (him) after your favorite president?

Do you spell it the same as the president?

Wow, what are the names of your other kids?

I didn't know you guys were so into politics!

Welcome to the world, Clinton Wade Morris.

I would have had Regan Scout Scarbrough because I am down like that with Politics. But Big Daddy had other plans.

Contemplating Romance

What did you and your husband/significant other picture when you contemplated having children?A sweet house with a white picket fence, kids romping happily in the yard? Lots of meaningful talks around the dinner table, a la “Leave It to Beaver”? Time to actually cook dinner?
The family life I pictured: some kids; walks on the beach; dinner parties with good food and witty friends; great vacations and talks with my cheerful family (sorry, my fantasies frequently involve food and drink); time after the little darlings went to bed for chatting with my hubby and … you know … a little romance.



What I got...

IS

A

House full

Of

FUN>:)

and little fingers under my bedroom door, "Can you see me NoW?"

PMS

OK, two questions while I should be getting ready for school instead of blogging..





Can men have PMS?








Can women who are breastsfeeding have PMS?





ok, I know the answer to the second one,

but I am mood (ier) and want to punch everyone.
(somewhat including my kids, not really going to do it for anyone debating on calling CPS,




something we no so good writers and readers of the English languge call a figure of speach...)

and Scott?

He

IS

a

PILL!!!!




(blogger speak for a**)

Move over Wesie, there is a new sherriff in town.

FINALLY!!! He is here.

Our second boy is here. BB( mr. no name) Morris arrived Jan 5th, early am. He was about the same size as Kelsey-longer. I am so glad for Heather and Chris. I know because of the last one they were nervous and anxious. However, he is healthy, and he is loved. I was expecting his name to be Prince Charming or Soccer Ball- if you took a page from the choices the girls had for the last baby.
;0)

Now if they can get him named. If they are not careful, BB will stick. Look at our house. Sister stuck. People in Primary when we moved to our new ward thought that Kennedy's name was Sister for weeks.

New Horse in the Pen

So, yesterday after much talking and praying we decided that it WAS right to add another horse to our string.

SIGH

Even I know it is right, and I don't want the dang thing. We also made a goal to pay off debt and get rid of at least 1 (I think 2) horses. We will see if this horse can take Scott to the next level while paying off our CCs. I don't know how this will help with our other goal of getting out of debt, but everytime I pray about it, I get that warm fuzzy feeling.

SO, we got Dulley. or is it Dully, Duly, Duley- I wonder how we are going to spell it.

I hate spelling.

Santa, Snoring, and a Baby in a Drawer

We went to the hospital for Christmas. I wanted the kids to remember the funny Christmas part of this and not the scary part of this-earlie in the week Kennedy thought Scott was dying. She is nosey and at the age where she puts 2 and 2 together to get 5.

We got there about 2. We got a big big taco bell lunch and played with dad who was ready to sleep. We didn't bring blankets ( on purpose) and Kennedy was getting confused and worried. I cooked up the story that she needed to wash her hands and the kids were off to the public bathroom. I whipped out the sleeping bag from Santa, left a note on it for her and ran out the door. When Kennedy came back in and FINALLY saw the bag, it was a nice surprise and maybe a booster for her to believe in Santa ( she is waivering).

My sister showed up, took the kids to my grandpa's for Christmas Eve dinner and Scott and I had a quiet night until about 8:30. Scott slept while I watched The Christmas Story.

The kids came back, opened 1 christmas present- PJs from my mom and settled down for a long winter's nap with visions of sugar plums dancing in their heads.

About 10:30 Scott woke me up and I groggily put out presents, making sure each had a fair amount. Which was a good thing, because later, Kennedy was sure that Wesie got more that she did. I didn't think so, but you know how little kids are.

The funniest thing was where everyone had to sleep.

Yep, that is Kelsey, in a drawer. I figured if the old timers could do it, I could too for one night.

What you get when you ask for help

When we were in the hospital, I took my youngest brother up on his offer to help me with chores. I didn't take anyone else up on that offer, but it was Christmas eve, we were spending the night and I needed to get over there. So, I called.

First, he sounded put out a little and weird. (like usual), however, I ignored that and told him what I wanted. Fire wood, water for the horses and feeding for the horses.

He got at the house; the kids wanted to go with him. I knew Wesie knew what to do so I told Jake to listen to Wesie. I thought Jake had fed horses like we did as kids; I thought he would interpreted what Wesie said to do and do what was right.

I was so wrong.

I called Jake the next day to see what he did. He told me he fed 1 flake to each horse and called in the cows for 2 more bales.

What the kids told him was 6 flakes to EACH horse, 2 flakes to the bull that was penned up and nothing to the the cows in the pasture.

Where was Jake when we were growing up???

Family talk

After talk amongst the kids we decided this situation is very familiar.

Marriages have been ruined and had lots of trouble before in this family (who has not had that problem)
, I read somewhere that you keep repeating the life lessons until you learn them. Guess we did not learn.

We didn't want to see that happen this time. It was too hard to watch it the last few times for poeple to go throught that. There have been ex's in our family who are so believable in their lies or outrageous in their behavior (like not making a kid take a bath while he/she visited for a month) and I am beginning to realize that this situation is cut from the same cloth.

We all wanted wanted to set the story straight before things got out of hand for Wes in the future.


We set the appointment .



We got together and started talking. The bishop didn't see things the way we did. He kept telling us to take the high road and I kept thinking about Joesph Smith; how did he do it. We tried to tell him what was really going on without rehashing the sordid past. It did no real good. I was diappointed in the outcome. I expected the bishop to act shocked, surprised or something.

He just smiled that slow smile and tried to get us to be patient.

I agree with his councel, but I was expecting fireworks, not those little pops you get in a box. But little pops are nice too.

Jerry Springer would be disapointed, maybe I am too.

So here is the low down on the fueneral.



We got there a little late. (I like to be very prompt-spurring from my days as a family who walked into church late and had to "mother duck it" to the front row)



People were milling around - many, many people. It was a little surprising to see how many people came to pay their respects to this little old silly lady Granma Orna. She was such a quiet retecient person in the family that it never dawned on me that she might have shone in the community.

The relief society room was getting full- luckily Big Daddy and I had gotten there early enough to pick the back row-center.

I had been told there was a nursery-thank goodness, didn't want to battle our children-they would be so bored. I was rounding up kids-mine and cousins. When I came back into the room, Aunt Karen and Helen were sitting in my seat. I was so nervous that when I answered Karen's question about my seat it came out,



"Pfft, ummm no haahaa"

Stupid huh?

Anyway, I went back to the nursery with more kids. When I was walking back down the hall, I see Helen


followed by Karen

followed by Josh. I wondered what had just happened. But I was really focused on getting kids to nursery and didn't pursue the train of thought.

I went in just in time to have the family prayer before the services started. It was a nice little prayer and then the family shuffled off to the front rows. It was a conga line of family. I wondered if there were some hangers on just wanting a good seat.

Life sketches were given by the three boys: Wes, Snuff- who I thought was going to take forever, and Pat. That alone was 45 minutes> Ugg I thought we were going to be there for years. My baby was passed down the line like a box of tissues. I think Uncle Ryon used her to get out of singing. Why didn't I think of that???

Oh, cause He got to it first.

Any way. After the grandkids and spouses and greats sang "I am a child of God" like a tom cat perched on a fence on Saturday, there were stories and tributes- I even got to give one. I told of how she would let my kids go crazy with her lipstick all the while telling me it was no big deal. It was then, it isn't now.

A song was sung by her twin sisters . The closing spiritual thoughts were given.

I got up to check on the kids and I saw Helen again. She was on the back right pew. Why she didn't sit with the kids I don't know. But it caused some gossip.

but that was all

It was a typical boring LDS funeral right down to the weird casseroles for lunch after the burial.

I was temped to have a food fight to lighten things up

maybe that phone call I made to Jerry Springer was premature. :)

Jumping the Gun and to Conclusions.

OK, to have a blog is to let it all hang out there while jumping to conclusions. Then, you have to make sure you take it back and hope that all the people you poisioned with your negative thoughts read and understand.

Oh, the lesson of gossip....

Oh, the lesson of NO Patience...

So here is my humble pie. please have a slice with me if you need to.

My FIL came over and told us his future plans. They sound like good righteous goals. I realize that I have not given him enought credit because for so long he didn't give himself credit. He has plans for the temple as soon as he can go. That is bitter sweet, but we all have to have bygones in life and this has to be mine. I feel so sorry for my hubby. In his growing up years with no priesthood example in his home.

BUT

I can't let my bitter sweet what-should-have-beens get in the way of what could be. I can't wait for the future blessings for our family and his potentially new one. How exciting! (you have to say that in the most prince john from the cartoon robin hood voice... what you don' know that one? watch it)

I just have a question.. How would one treat the MIL in a divorce? She has been generous on her own terms, nice when she wants to,loves her kids fiercely, and there are other nice qualities, and

I dont' want to throw the baby out with the bath water so to speak.

I just ready Missy's blog on charity and still have twinges of that hovering over me like sugar plums dancing in my head. What is the better road to take with the situation without getting sucked into it? Gosh now I know how everyone must have felt when Scott and I were at those cross roads.

SO now? How much support do I give and when do I say' " You got to do this on your own...?"

Anyone?, anyone,?

Bueler, ...

Bueler????

Colder than a Can of Worms

IT is 1 degree! 1!! I hate the cold, a lot. It could never be cold again and I would be happy. Not really happy but content. I remember living in Mesa and sometime around September the green would just look wrong and tired, like it needed winter.

I guess I need winter too. It makes me appreciate Summer that much more. Which then makes me think that I am grateful for so many things: like family who are close and our relative health ( I know, ha, we all have gotten out of the hospital) but we are not terminal. I am grateful for our good jobs in this time of recession and I truly feel for those who don't have good jobs.

I know I opened up a can of worms a family issue that I should have kept pent up. I should be more Christlike.

And maybe, just maybe after I get out of church today I will edit it or get rid of it all together because

WWJD....

Not spend days blogging that is for sure.

Thank You Grandma "Orna"

Lorna M. Scarbrough passed away at 10:58 am 12/3/08. She will be missed by her 10 grandchildren and married spouses , 11 great-grandchildren two sons and daughters in law.

The girls came and got me to go to Snowflake yesterday. We said good-bye in the funeral home. She was still warm and had good color. I took it for granted that people who passed away were cold and stiff immediately. She look peaceful and beautiful, but of course different.

We picked out a coffin, a book and set up the program-spelling the names and getting the order of speaking correct. We made plans to clean her grave site, put make up on her and in general get things ready for her funeral. Then we got to laughing at all the funny memories we had of her.

We ate taco bell and went home. When we went home we gathered to tell the grandkids. My kids didn't get it until later. (We had a rough bedtime and my kids slept together.)

Then we went to Corkey's to eat - again. While we were there Mother came. She slung open the door, and stomped in. Good thing that Corkey's was empty. She accused us of not telling her about Lorna and having to find out from strangers at 5:30 that evening.

I was possessed. I told her she was wrong. Cheska called her at 11 to tell her that she thought grandma had died, and then tried to call her back to confirm it the rest of the day but she didn't answer her phone. Mother said she didn't have missed calls. I said that I was there 1/2 the time when Cheska called; I know she did try to call her all day. Scott piped up and mentioned that if you don't have service, then your phone doesn't show up as a missed call.

She changed the subject after Scott got in on it and asked me what was going on with the funeral. I started to detail it out for her and in the middle of talking to her, she walked out the door. I looked at her and then at the kids. My jaw dropped open...

We kept eating. What should we have done?

Saying goodbye

Sunday we went to Snowflake to say goodbye.

Scott's grandma is in hospice care at his uncle's home.

I don't know how I feel about it all. It was a special, sad and spiritual experience. She was clearly shutting down-didn't have much energy nor could she think clearly. She isn't eating much at all and can't drink much, but the hospice people said that is normal, her body doesn't need much. She is communicating with the other side.
When we left, the baby cried a sad sad cry. She didn't cry a mad or hurt cry, (you mom's know what I am talking about) but something you would hear from an older person. I can't even explain it if you were not there to hear it. It was like she felt how close the veil was and was sad that she couldn't have that still. She was mopey and serious-very unlike herself for 2 days. I hope Lorna is a peace.

And yet, life renews, We have a new little neice in the family- Kelsey at 3 months is no longer the baby baby.

Baby-to -be-named is 4 weeks early, full full head of hair. I think you can put it up all ready, 6lbs 7 oz and 18 inches long!!

to put it in perspective, she is pretty much the same as Kelsey was at full term. Can you imagine if she had been full term??? 11 lb baby!! Yikes and oh my!